Hope amidst the storm

In the wake of Hurricane Helene, community matters

You can hold two feelings at once.

That advice was shared with me during a crisis our family experienced more than a decade ago. Ever since, these words have become a mantra I pass on to others facing grief, loss, and sadness.

Laughter and sorrow. Joy and sadness. They coexist.

You can feel two things at once.

Friends, as I scribble these words old-school style from my kitchen table in western North Carolina, I'm reminded again of their poignancy.

It's still dark outside. But soon the sun will rise, and I'll have a glorious view of the fall color underneath a Carolina blue sky. From this vantage point, the trees shield the devastation below.

It's beautiful, and my heart is also breaking.

All along the sides of the roads - what's left of them - are piles and piles and piles. Not just mounds of branches or stacks of wood but heaps of furniture, muddy carpet, abandoned toys, and dozens of black garbage bags filled with the contents of someone's life. The most chilling sight was a hand-scrawled sign tacked on the front of a battered home: "I'M ALIVE."

The roads are here, but they are more "concepts" of roads. They don't connect anymore. Locals describe them like Laffy Taffy, as if someone just took the asphalt and crumpled it up. Buckled, twisted, broken. I didn't even know that was possible. And then there are sections completely washed away. You've seen the photos. Other sections are so treacherous and could break at any moment because so much of the footing has been carved away.

The sounds. All day you hear generators running and small aircraft coming and going. Yesterday we saw military Chinooks flying in and landing in an open area to bring supplies to still unreachable areas.

There's so much confusion. Where to go for help? What to do? Because normal communication is cut off and misinformation is rampant. Of all the families I served (including those helping), very, very few had power or water. Cell or wifi is spotty at best.

And on the flip side! The human spirit is alive and well. And kindness is winning. 💕

• -Crews of volunteers in orange t-shirts and work boots bravely going into homes to clear away the destruction

• Locals with ATVs doing their part to distribute supplies to unreachable areas

• An elementary school turned into a supply distribution center - donations are making their way into the hands of people who have lost everything

• Linemen from miles and miles away who are restoring power and dealing with dangerous downed wires

• The highway full of trailers with supplies pouring in from other areas - people who just want to help, just want to do something

This is a physical storm, but you don't have to be weathering a natural disaster to experience a storm. These are difficult times for many. Dr. Laura Spiller, a member of The Hive and founder of PractiSage Therapist Collective, beautifully articulated the challenges many are facing:

"Things are tough right now. The cost of living is higher, and no matter where you land politically, the uncertainty ripples through our lives, minds, and clients' experiences."

In times like these, we see why community matters. We're reminded that we're better together, and that we should never struggle alone. Whether you're building an online community or supporting your local neighborhood, the principles remain the same: connection, support, and kindness are not just nice-to-haves – they're essential.

As community builders, we create spaces where people come together and support one another through both physical and emotional storms. During life's storms, here are three questions Dr. Spiller suggests we ask ourselves:

1. What matters to me most in this struggle?

2. What are my values about who I want to be?

3. What's in my control?

I encourage you to take a moment to reflect on these questions. Then, consider how you can apply them to your community-building efforts.

How can you create spaces that allow people to connect with what matters most to them? How do your values provide a shared sense of purpose? What actionable steps can you take to make a difference?

🫶 As we move from relief to recovery in western North Carolina, I've started a grassroots database of small businesses in the area. If you know of a business that could use support, please encourage them to enter their information here: https://bit.ly/WNCBizIntake. Your help in spreading the word is appreciated. We'll be making the database available starting next week, but for now, our focus is on connecting with businesses and collecting their information.

UPDATE » This is a story of community-in-action for another day, but we’re partnering with Brands of NC to spread the word about these business. Your support is greatly appreciated and businesses can apply to be listed.

For those who want to help with hurricane relief efforts, World Central Kitchen is doing incredible work partnering with local chefs and restaurants to provide meals in disaster areas. This LI post has a list of other local agencies.

And as we come together to support those affected by Hurricane Helene, let's not forget that Hurricane Milton is now barreling toward Florida. Our thoughts are with those in its path.

You can make a difference. Your kindness, your support, your willingness to listen can be the hope someone needs.

In the face of devastation, we've seen an incredible outpouring of love and selflessness. We can indeed hold two feelings at once - sorrow for what's lost, and gratitude for the countless acts of compassion. The human spirit is alive and well. And kindness is winning. 💕

We never have to struggle alone. Community Matters.

We're better together,

If you're looking for ways to support the recovery efforts or get involved, don't hesitate to reach out. The smallest actions make a difference. Just one photo of a business owner in Banner Elk, NC, setting aside his business to help others who've lost everything. Thanks, Hayden. 💛